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“You never know what’s around the corner. It could be everything. Or it could be nothing. You keep putting one foot in front of the other, and then one day you look back and you’ve climbed a mountain.”
― Tom Hiddleston


Cameron Highlands, 2016



In response to Weekly Photo Challenge: Narrow


I Lost You in Croatia

I don’t know you well, but I lost you anyway.

I lost you on the way from Zadar, three years ago. After I received the unexpected notification, I remembered looking out of the van down the scenic road, and nothing much after. It was as though as I ate an ice cream too fast, except that the brain-freeze lasted longer than a few seconds. The world then felt as though it simultaneously sped up and slowed down, like a broken record player.

That day, I walked into a tiny church, while the rest of my friends were enjoying the scenic view of Croatia. I sat at the pew alone as I mourned for you. I lit a candle and prayed for your safe journey. And once again, I struggled to cope with the brutality of loss. You were a difficult person to know, with your barrier up and ego high, but you were family. Despite that, given the circumstances of how you left, it pained me to know that you may be alone in your final moments.

I hardly looked at the photographs taken during the trip since, knowing that behind posed smile that looked natural were seemingly forced. As days turned into weeks and months into years, I learn to cope with grief, one of the many inevitable life lessons that shape and define us.

But once in a while, I look up at the sky sometimes, and hope that wherever you are, you finally found peace.


Croatia, 2013


I don’t understand the things you did,
But I wished you know,
I loved you nevertheless

I can’t take your tiredness away,
But with every dish I scrubbed,
I wanted to ease your burden

I can’t take your anger away,
But with every floor I mopped,
I showed you I cared

I can’t take your bitterness away,
But with every cake I baked,
I hoped to sweeten your day

I can’t take your remorse away,
But with my last breath,
I forgave you

I can’t take your grief away
I can only hope
you find peace within.

Let Me Love You

This could be our story
two independent souls
resonating at the same frequency

Let me show you how our hands fit
and how curves of our bodies match
like perfect puzzle pieces

Let me be your flame
warm your world with joyful smiles
and your ears with bubbly laughter

Let me be your harbour
a safe place that you can reside
a place you share your hopes and dreams

Let me show you the maps to my heart
as I let you trace the paths
to where nobody has ever been

This could be our story
two introverts braving the world
breaking out of our comfort zones

Let me lend you my strength
at times when you feel weak
and everything seems to go wrong

Let me listen without judgement
as you vent your frustration and anger
and confide your fears and worries

Let me share the weight of the world
when the monsters in the shadows emerge
in your hours of turmoil and self-doubt

Let me love you the way I can
through simple gestures
and sincere prayers

This could be our story
we may never know
but let me love you anyway.


I haven’t been writing lately. Writing was a way for me to let go; to ink away piece by piece the memories that I cling on to, until there is nothing left to weigh me down. And in this space I call my own, I have always been writing about myself and little about anyone else. As much as solitude comforts me, my life does not consist of my own self; it is intertwined and shaped by the people I meet during this journey. Continue reading